Highlights
Case Study
Lars De Jong was born on the 9 of August 1953 in Delft, Netherlands. The youngest of three children, Lars described his upbringing as ideal and he was very close to his parents and enjoyed school. At the age of 17, Lars met Isa and they married a year later. Lars’s father encouraged him to move to Australia to work for his uncle who had emigrated 20 years previously.
Although somewhat reluctant, Lars thought Australia sounded exciting and thought it would be a great start for both he and Isa. Isa was not as keen to move but wanted to do what would make Lars happy.
They arrived in Australia in 1970 and were excited to find they were expecting their first child (Finn was born in 1971, followed by a daughter Hanna in 1972). Lars was overjoyed to be a father and while still working for his Uncle started to explore the idea of starting his own bakery. This happened quite quickly when a nearby shop became vacant. Lars wanted to work close to home as he was worried about Isa, since arriving in Australia she had only made a few friends in the Dutch community and only spoke one or two words of English. Lars tried to encourage her to learn English but each time she became frustrated. Lars recalls that Isa cried frequently after the children were born - he felt it was because she was homesick.
While he was concerned about his wife, he felt that they needed to remain in Australia as his small business was becoming hugely successful, customers would travel long distances to buy his pastry goods. He worked hard, sometimes over 80 hours per week. He was well known in the community as a happy, hard-working and very likable man. His hospitality was well known, and the family home was host to many memorable events and parties. Isa was an excellent cook and no-one ever went hungry, although she preferred to stay in the kitchen cooking and washing up, while Lars entertained the guests with his stories and singing.
Isa discovered in 1979 that she was pregnant again, although shocked she was excited; however, the baby boy was stillborn at full term. Isa felt deep sadness and a sense of failure, she started smoking heavily (60 cigarettes per day). She rarely left the house. Lars said little and instead worked harder and spent the remainder of his time in his shed, working on old cars.
In 1990 after dropping out of university Finn decided to work for his father – for Lars this was a defining moment as he now had a family business – this had been his dream and to celebrate he had the front of the shop repainted with “De Jong & Son Family Bakery”. Lars was content and his daughter completed her education and was awarded a Bachelor of Education and worked for several years as a primary school teacher. Hanna started a family with her partner Mark. Hanna gave birth to Charlie in 2006. By the time Charlie was 3 years old it was noticed that he was different to other children and not reaching his milestones, after testing Charlie was diagnosed with Autism. Mark left shortly after his diagnosis and returned to his parent’s farm in the Queensland.
Lars subdivided his very large block and built a house for Hanna and Charlie next door. It was around this time that Isa’s health started to deteriorate. Lars spent more time at home helping both Isa and Hanna. Finn took over the running of the business and convinced his father to expand the business by buying second shop. Lars was incredibly proud and told everyone what a good business head his son had. However, Lars was unaware that Finn had a gambling problem and was taking large sums of money from the business. In 2008 during the global financial crisis, Finn left Australia and Lars and Isa have not heard from him despite their efforts to trace and contact him. Due to the debts that Finn accumulated in Lars’s name, he lost the business and almost lost his family home.
Lars now cares for Isa full-time, she has COPD, Type 2 Diabetes and difficulty walking without a frame due to her weight gain. Lars now cooks, cleans and provides Isa’s personal care. He has declined all offers of assistance from healthcare providers, family and friends, as it is “his job to care for his wife not a stranger”. Lars had planned a retirement in which they could both travel and enjoy their children and grandchildren – Lars had saved hard for retirement but the debts from the business took all their savings and they now rely solely on the pension. Isa has not left the house in over a year. The financial struggles, losing contact with his son and caring for his wife have taken an emotional toll on Lars.
In August of this year, Hanna saw the lights on in her father’s shed and thought she would go and have a chat as her father seemed quite down in the past few months. As she approached the shed, she saw him sitting in his beloved 1962 EJ Holden, at first, she thought he was sleeping but something didn’t seem right, when she opened the car door, she found Lars unresponsive and ran inside to call 000.
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